Chi-Town

Chi-town for a conference!

Dodged a Bullet

Man am I lucky!

I was at a friends' house for a Friday night fish fry- so yummy and so much fun! It was a fun group of 8 drinking and enjoying our Friday night. Some of the boys were talking about going out afterwards but us ladies didn't plan on that. I was in my Brewers gear with my hair in a ponytail - not in any state to go up bar hopping.

Anyways, we hung out for a while, the boys left to go out and us ladies finished cleaning up the kitchen. After that I ended up driving my way home - took the beltline for some reason - which I never do. In the time I was driving home I received a number of texts from my a guy friend that was downtown and met up with the guys that were at the fish fry. It was only 10:30 and I decided why not go to meet them out? WHY NOT?! I wasn't dressed great but who cares! So I got off the beltline, turned around and got back on quickly and started heading downtown. I turned up the music, belated out some tunes and didn't think about anything. I had no idea that in the dark there was a cop driving right behind me.

Lights come on and at first I am confused but then realize I was speeding on the beltline and not paying attention to anything. I pull over to the left and he comes up right behind me - I hate it when they leave their lights on full blast and we are both stopped - can't they just dim the lights a bit to keep the sting away from being pulled over?

So I sit there for a minute, turn down the music and then realize I need to get my ID and insurance card out. I reach to get my purse and as I am pulling it up it seems a bit light to me...shit I don't have my wallet...

He walks up to the car and at this point I know a ticket is coming my way. He shines his flashlight in my face (even though I had a drink earlier I wasn't feeling it at this point but I was afraid I had red wine teeth) and asks me if I know why he pulled me over. I told him I know I was speeding and I was sorry - I was just rocking out to my music and not paying attention. He told me that he agreed and it was unsafe and that when I got onto the beltline I had recklessly gotten over to the left lane to speed up (little did he know I wanted to get way over and around the old grannies that were driving 10 under, but who am I to argue?). Then he asked for my license...shit....

I lifted up my empty purse and showed him inside and told him that I had grabbed my purse but forgot my wallet in my other purse. Total mistake. He asked for any other ID with my name/picture on it. Of course I have nothing, but thank goodness I DO have my insurance card! I hand that to him and he goes back to his car for a what seems like an eternity.

Finally he comes back and hands me my insurance card. He tells me again how I was speeding, driving 'recklessly' and driving without a license. I would have a $350 ticket on my hands. I apologized profusely, admitted that I was speeding and not paying attention as I was jamming out and that I'd be more careful...so as he handed me the papers he told me that he was giving me a....warning!! OMG I am so lucky I can't believe it! I thanked him again and off he went.

As I pulled away, he did as well and he followed me the whole way until I got off the beltline! Now any sane person would have gone home at this point but I had been texting my friends downtown and they convinced me to come down for a couple to recoup from what I had just experienced - twisted my arm! Now the only question was how I would get into the bars and pay for drinks - another issue for the night...

First bar I go to I usually know the bouncer - but guess what, be wasn't at the door! Some chick was falling around drunk right outside the door causing a scene so I walked in and before he could ask for my ID I told him that he might want to get some help for her...totally worked! Found my friends and they bought me a shot and a drink to celebrate and calm my nerves. After a while they decided to leave and go to another bar...hopefully I can get it!

We went down the street to Merchant and as we were walking in an annoying bigger man was walking out that I know through Magnet (social networking). I said hello immediately and chatted with him to walk back in with me and cover me from the bouncers - totally worked but now I was stuck with bad-breath-annoying man! We ended up saying our goodbyes and again my guy friends bought me drinks.

All in all it was a great night, but I was so lucky and definitely dodged a bullet. This was a wake up call to me and I am sure to drive more carefully from now on - especially if I am to buy a new RED car this summer!

Wing Man

A bunch of girls and I went out last night. I had gone out the night before so I was not in it for the long haul but thought why not go out for a drink or two?! Need to keep putting myself out there!

We went to DLUX first - I love that place. It has such a cool vibe and it feels like you're in Chicago or New York. It was kind of dead so we decided to head to Merchant a block down. It was also kind of dead there but it started heating up more as the night went on. Merchant ended up being the place to be because more and more people came that I knew! It was super fun and I ended up talking with a guy for a while (let's call him Mr Shorty). He seemed pretty cool and we got along well. After a while though he ended up going to talk to another girl (even though he had gotten my number already)...not cool dude.

Then we ended up going to where we always seem to go...Madison's. We were waiting in line to get in and who skips the entire line to get in with us...yep Mr Shorty and he's super drunk. I'm not into him anymore at this point and then he pulls out a cigarette and is asking everyone in line for a lighter because his matches keep blowing out! I told the bouncer as he was letting us all in that he wasn't with us :) Hehe.

Now Madison's can either be super ghetto and not fun, or it can be a good time with lots of good-looking people. It was super busy in the bar and I noticed there were actually a lot of potentials! I was excited about that but because of some previous drama within the group I didn't have the wing men in my girls I needed! I also didn't really feel like drinking at this point and thought I'd try this all sober - maybe not a good idea because then I wasn't as social as I normally am. I made eye contact with one guy but he ended up being there with another girl. I chatted with another guy while he was at the bar getting a drink and I thought it was going well but I turn around to talk to one of the girls and when I turn back he's gone! I tried to move around so I'd be closer to a third guy and he seemed like he wanted to talk to me but I ended up getting pulled out of the bar to go across the street! Three strikes and I'm out.

Now usually as many of you know, I'm a pretty outgoing person and quite aggressive when it comes to something I want. Lately I've been thinking about that and it hasn't worked yet so maybe I should change my game? I would totally have gone up to these guys and said something but I am so unsure of myself lately that I don't know if that would work anymore! I also usually have one of my best friends with me and she rocks at being a wing man. She helps me scope out the scene, moves closer and 'bumps' into guys I'm interested in, and sometimes she just goes up and starts talking to them! Just what a single girl needs!

So anyways we go across the street to another bar. We walk in and I instantly see that there is nothing interesting here. The place is practically dead and I am tired and disappointed that I wasn't successful at the previous bars. I decide to head home at this point...it just wasn't my night...

My Work - Chapter 1 (1-10)

I am a teacher and I am proud to be a teacher. I have wanted to be an educator since I was five years old. When I was in college I never thought that I would like to teach kindergarten so I did not look down those avenues at first. But as time went on I decided to get my degree in pre-K through sixth-grade. Little did I know I would be teaching kindergarten with one of my best friends for over six years now. I have grown to love the grade that I teach and value my time with those children and my coworker so so much. I strive to be a better person and teacher for my past, present and future students and for all my coworkers around me. Although we might not all get along, I do believe that we are all here for the same reason and even though we might not all have the same work effort and motivation, we care about our students and want only the best for them. For those teachers that don't have that effort - I feel they need to move on and let other young teachers with motivation and eagerness to come in and make a difference.

This leads me into my next discussion about my job. Most teachers work so hard and so long and put in time that we don't expect to be made up or paid for. I know that we complain about this constantly and people are annoyed with it but it means something to us (otherwise we wouldn't be talking about it!). Please let me take the time here to list and explain just exactly we do for our students, families and others around us.

1. We get together over the summer when we are not paid and discuss the future and what this next year holds for us. We plan events, field trips, curriculum and much more to make sure that we reach our students' needs. Yes we have the summers off, but we don't get paid for them and wouldn't you need time off for spending 9.5 months with children that aren't yours?

2. We purchase items all year round with our own money (not only during the school year but also in the summer) to help aid us in teaching our students literacy, social studies, math, science, and social situations.

3. On average we spend 7 to 8 and even 9 hours with our students. We make a huge difference on these children's lives and the weight on our shoulders is always there. The pressure to succeed and have our students succeed will never go away. Sometimes we even spend more time with our students than their parents do...

4. In lower income schools however, we are often dealing with families that do not want to communicate with schools. I call home to talk to them about their child and the phone is not connected anymore. I walk home with the students but I am not allowed in the house. I want to send a note home with the child and it is ripped up right away. The child brings homework home and wants to try to complete it and instead they get a "whooping." Will we ever break that barrier? How do we get families to care about being a part of their child's education?

5. The first 5 years that I was a teacher I spent hours after school not only working on new activities for my students but also working on learning the curriculum and learning how to better meet the needs of every single one of my children. Some learn better in small groups, some learn better in large groups, some learn better individually, how am I supposed to meet the needs of all the students? This is something that we are challenged with everyday. In your job how do you meet the needs of every single person that comes into your office? Do you make the same plan for every person? No, you meet that persons' needs and wants - exactly what we do, except for 16-20 different children every single year. In my 8 years of teaching, I have taught 144 students so far...that's a lot!

6. I am constantly going on the Internet and Pinterest to search for new activities for my students to do during math or literacy centers. I'm always trying to find the next best idea on how to teach beginning sounds, vowels, end sounds, blends, phonemic awareness, rhymes, sight words, counting, adding, subtracting, ordering, taking turns, etc...

7. Centers are activities that the children can do independently for a certain amount of time. When the bell rings they clean up their center and move onto the next center. In the picture attached, the pocket chart I have created is to help the children decipher what center is theirs using the picture cues. The black lines on the chart decipher which level they are at - left is high, middle is medium, and the right is low. Most to all of our students have no idea the pocket chart is leveled like this. During this time, we are teaching small group reading groups, which is also differentiated based on how they are doing and what level they are reading at. All of these pictures are created by me and my teaching partner. We are constantly trying to think of new ideas and new centers for our students to do to reach these needs: rhyming, first sound, last sound, rhyming, consonant-vowel-consonant, letter matching, sound matching, sentence writing, computer, listening, writing workshop, dictionary, creative writing, and so so so much more. We have been thinking about writing a book for some time now but centers just keep changing constantly to keep things interesting. Got any ideas for me?!

8. There are science and math nights at school and we are expected to come. This is not just a job that we can go to from 7:30 until 3:00. We are expected to stay later and are expected to come at night. Don't get me wrong this is not something that we don't want to do but we also need to have lives of our own.

9. Being in a low poverty school we often have students that do not eat much at home or do not get a chance to have a lot of sustenance at home. I am constantly buying snacks or getting snacks from friends to send home with them at nights and on weekends. Some even tell me that they hide their snacks under their bed so they are able to eat it and don't have to share with everyone. They have to be selfish in order to eat the food so they don't have growling stomachs all weekend. Do you come across a lot of people like that? Would you be willing to donate money or food to give children the food that they want and deserve at home? Of course you would.

10. I buy ink for my printer consistently throughout the year because I want to print things off in color and that's the only way. My ink cartridges cost $60 every time, and I have to refill it every couple of months...

There will be more to come (will try to explain 100!) but please understand that I am being completely honest and we do so much more than we tell. Not trying to bitch about my job because I love what I do, but I want people to understand exactly what we do for our future generations...

Update on Bachelor

I've been getting a lot of questions about what has happened since that crazy night so here is an update...

I have not heard from him again - thankfully - and have not seen his ugly gold SUV near or on my street (guess I should have listened to my sister when she said never trust a man with a gold car!). I have since quit match, but have also reported him to the Match.com people. Not sure what they do with that info but I gave them the link to my blog and basically asked them if they think someone like that should be on their site. Boom.

I have not seen him around town, but about a week ago a friend of mine was at the same fundraiser as he was. She said he was with a girl and I felt bad for her (even though she was a bit 'trashy'). No woman should ever go through what had to endure. About 2 hours later my friend texts me to tell me that his date ditched out and he was circling the place trying to find her. Haha YES! Totally what he deserves - to be shit on over and over again!

No new dates here though either...kind of in a draught...stay warm!

Goals

Having goals is a practice we all take part in throughout our entire lives. Goals to graduate school, get a job, find that special someone, lose weight and continue to grow our families. Goals are there to keep us motivated and on "the right track," whatever that may be...

I have of course taken part of creating and reaching most of my goals in life. They are ever changing and I still have some to overcome. I graduated from college, got a good job in a city I love, bought a home, graduated with a masters degree and have friends whom I trust with my life. We all have things we are proud of, but are there some goals you're still working towards? Something you have not obtained yet?

As you know from my previous entries, I have been working at my goal of finding the man meant for me. I have such wonderful people around me that fulfill my life, but I want a partner, I want to find my person. It's been a LONG and TOUGH road and although I have been beaten down and pushed around, I will get back up and try again and again.

We all have goals and although the end seems far far away and it doesn't look good, please have confidence in yourself and the power you have to do whatever you want with your life. I will just keep trucking on....

When you reach your goal(s) what will you do?

Crazy Bachelor (Chapter 3)

He held my hand all the way back to the car and opened the door for me. What a gentleman. As he started to drive back to my place - the west side - I started to tell him which way to go. He didn't like that suggestion and gave me a weird look so I decided to just let him drive the way that he wanted to drive me home. It appeared obvious that he was taking the longest way possible. Remember, I was playing sick, so he started to talk about how he felt bad that I didn't feel well and that he wanted to take care of me tonight. I looked over at him and told him that when I don't feel well I prefer to be alone. He said that was ridiculous because when a person doesn't feel well they should have the person they care about the most with them. He said that rubbing my temples and rubbing my back will make me feel better - weird. Again, I reiterated that I did not feel well and I preferred to be alone that night. Apparently he didn't like that answer...

He started yelling at me again about how "I am putting up walls and that we have a great connection and I should appreciate him more."
I was stunned at how he so suddenly started yelling (again) that I just calmly said, "I'm sorry Dave it's not that its just that I don't want you to see me this way."
"We'll that's ridiculous Lindsey, I should be there for you. I am coming up to take care of you tonight."
"No Dave you're not I'm sorry I just need to be alone." There's no way I was letting him near the door.

Well me saying that of course tipped him off again and he started raging on again about how I don't appreciate people, I am rude when someone wants to be a romantic at a restaurant. Great he brings that up again.
"I just wanted to feed myself sushi, it wasn't that I didn't appreciate what you were trying to do."
He goes "well you let me feed you at The Dane!"
"No Dave, I tried a bite of your apples."
He starts up again yelling at me as we finally get on the belt line at Fish Hatchery. All I wanted to do was tell him to drop me off at the Great Dane Fish Hatch so I could walk to my friends house but it scared me to involve her in this part of the night.

Then he says: "what would Jesus say!?" Um excuse me - seriously?!?!
"How does Jesus have any relevance to this conversation?!" I asked incredulously.
"He will judge you for your actions - he will!" Ha, ok well he will judge me well that I'm not freaking out more right now and am staying calm.

I should preface that this entire time we've been in the car he is driving very erratically. The first minute he goes super fast - way over the speed limit and the next minute he is going super slow and way under the speed limit. As we are going down the belt line, he is doing the same thing and when a couple people pass him or honk at him he's screaming at them and giving them the finger. I was so scared.

He starts yelling at me again and for a while I just drown him out and just don't even answer. He yells and then looks at me for an answer and when I don't respond, he starts back up again. While he is doing this and yelling at me for my 'wrong doing' I realize that what he is mad at me for is exactly what he has and is doing.

He says "I know that after tonight this is probably done between you and me, but you are the one who ruined it all - you should know that!" I just say "yes, we will just go our separate ways after tonight."

"You act like you're all perfect and that you are the greatest thing. This is ridiculous, Dave is a great catch, Dave does well for himself and treats a woman right. Tell me one thing that is wrong with Dave!"
Haha okay.
"First off, I never said I was perfect. And you talk in third person..."
"So!"
"And you name drop all the time."
"Yea I know half the city and you should be aware of that!"
I say "well they aren't attractive qualities."
He throws up his hands and says "why are you being so mean and saying these rude thing about me!"
"Because you just asked me to!" Seriously dude!
He goes "you probably think I'm an arrogant asshole now!"
"I never said you were an asshole." But I would say he's arrogant!

At this point he finally has made it to my street. I tell him to turn right but he goes to turn left. I correct him and he goes to get in the right lane to turn but there's a car there. They honk at him as we all slam on the brakes and he yells and gives them the finger. They look at me and I just give them a look that I hope says 'I'm sorry' and that 'this guy is crazy.' He yells at me for giving him the wrong direction.

As we are going along my neighborhood street he is seriously going 5 mph. I am still playing sick so I ask "why are you going to slow?"
He screams at me "because I want to get the most out of this conversation that I possibly can!"
"We'll I'm not feeling well and just want to lay down."
He speeds up to be going about 60 down our neighborhood street and runs a stop sign. There are a lot of cars parked on the street and with my luck as of now I could just see him hitting one. As we come around the turn, he starts slowing down like he was looking for my building. I point down and say "I'm just past the round about."
He screams again "I know where you live. Don't worry about that!"
Ok now that's scary.

He finally pulls up to the curb and as I worked at un-clipping my seatbelt which was stuck I told him that we would of course go our separate ways. He yells how I am so rude and that I'm going to regret this and that I don't know what I'm doing with my life.
As I'm finally getting out of his damn car, I say "thank you for putting words into my mouth."
As I am shutting the door he screams "it's your own fucking fault!!" He screeches out from the curb (if there was snow I would have gotten sprayed with it and that a whole other story).

As I finally get into my building I just start balling because at this point I had been screamed at and driven around by a crazy man for a half hour. I called my best friend and told her the whole thing. She was not happy with me for not letting her come and get me when she wanted to. I learned my lesson the hard way...

She suggests that I call a police friend to ask him what I should do as I am really scared at this point. I have no idea what Dave could do or is capable of.
As I'm talking to my friend and tell him a summary of this long story, I also say "oh and in the 5 minutes that we've been talking, Dave has called me twice."
My police officer friend says "ok so here's what you do. Hang up with me and the next time he calls answer it. You tell him straight out that you never want him to call you again. This way you've put that line out there and if he crosses it you can call the police again."
I didn't want to ever speak to Dave again but this made sense so the third time he calls I answer it and in a sickeningly soft tone Dave says: "hi, how are you doing? I really didn't like the way we left things." This is so creepy, like a switch had been turned again!
I say "Dave you really scared me. I have never been talked to or treated like that before and I was scared."
He goes "I'm sure you can understand where I'm coming from." Um, no!
"Well we can agree to disagree and go our separate ways from here. I will be friendly to you in public but please don't ever call me again."
He chuckles and says "you can guarantee that I will never call YOU again!"
I hang up and get ready for bed shaking - incredulous that this has just happened to me.

The next day I did what my police officer suggested - took my name off my mailbox, shut all my blinds and made sure to park inside for a week. Thankfully I have never heard from him again and I don't even plan on acknowledging him if I see him in public because I will honestly always be scared of this man. I can't believe this has happened and I learned some lessons the hard way. I'm just thankful that I'm ok and have some good people in my life who know what's right for me and are there to support me even when I am not making smart decisions...